I was doing some online research about early Roman civilization for some gut-busting radio spots I will soon be unleashing upon the airwaves, and I followed some thread about philosphers of the time. In particular, I found one to be interesting: Diogenes. The accompanying blurb reveals him to be one wacky fellow.
"DIOGENES: A Greek philosopher who believed that civilization was a fundamentally a lie and that life was optimally led without possessions. He lived in an old wine barrel outside Athens, defaced money, masturbated in the middle of the business district, tormented Plato and excreted anywhere at any time."
I think GG Allin swiped Diogenes' act. The masturbating in the business district and excreting anywhere at any time are all well and good, but I find myself focusing on the "tormented Plato" part. What did this tormenting entail? Did Diogenes light a match between Plato's toes? Did he rig a bucket of flour above Plato's door so that when he came out it spilled on him? I need details.