Thursday, April 19, 2007

The Shit List groweth


Nixon kept one. And so do I. It's called a "Shit List," and it was a concept introduced to me by my Dad, who would trot it out when he was pissed at me, my brother, or both of us."You're on my shit list", he would simply say. What a staggering thought for a young lad to hear! My mind would race, wondering if there were an actual tangible list hidden in a drawer somewhere, rendered in my Dad's crude, mispelled scrawl. Was it numbered? Was it organized by date, or by the severity of the perceived offense? So many questions.

Anyway, it's phrase that stuck with me. And the newest addition to my Shit List, and in fact they've rocketed to the coveted #1 slot, is...the Genie garage door opener company!

I bought a Genie garage door opener kit with keypad and 2 remotes a couple of months ago, and then installed it (thanks to some Milwaukee peeps who held it aloft while I bolted it into place. Thanks, fellas!). Last week one of the remotes stopped working. Putting a new battery didn't help, nor did reprogramming the remotes. So I had to buy a new one for 27 clams. Now the exterior keypad isn't working, and attempts to clear it and reprogram it have failed. Finding no answers on their website, I attempted to call their customer service number, where I was put on hold for a lengthy span of time before being cut off.

Congrats, Genie! You have joined an ever-growing list of luminaries that includes (but is certainly not limited to ) the following:

Volkswagen, the guy who did our landscaping, Ivan Reitman, my landlord from 1987-1988, and if you're not careful, YOU.

5 comments:

Jamie Baker said...

Ivan Reitman?

Vincent said...

Don't forget the lumber yard that custom fucked you front door.

BlogFoot said...

"Twins." "Junior." "Kindergarten Cop." Need I go on? What more must he do to earn your scorn? Kill a busload of schoolchildren?

You're absolutely right, Vincent. Thanks. How could I forget the boobs at SIWEK LUMBER & MILLWORK? In fact, they just may warrant their own blog entry.

Jamie Baker said...

OK, OK, don't put me on the list too...

BlogFoot said...

Let me get my eraser.

SFX: erasing / blowing sounds

Ok, you're off the list.