Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Look under a rock, and you're bound to find some dirt

So last night "Road House" was on, and I made the wife watch some of it with me. Being female, she was unamused by it's near-hallucinatory stupidity, unlike myself, who enjoys the film. She said "it made no sense." Well, duh. It's "Road House." It stars Patrick Swayze as a bouncer with a philosophy degree who vows to clean up a violent honky tonk bar and free a small town from the tyrannical rule of Ben Gazzara.

Plus, it contains one of the greatest lines of dialogue committed to celluoid - as Swayze and Ben Gazzara's head goon battle to the death, Swayze is on the ropes, and the goon snarls at him: "I used to fuck guys like you in prison!" Do tell.

I won't detail the film further or debate it's place in history; there are plenty of websites that have already done that. But I was going to send my wife the link to the wikipedia page so that she could get a better sense of the Homeric plot, and while reading said page, found some interesting tidbits in the trivia section, the most alarming of which was this:

"Script writer David Lee Henry had written the script with John Stamos in mind for the lead role, but Stamos was already on tour with his band "Jesse and the Rippers" at the time of filming, so Patrick Swayze was chosen for the part."

Jesus. That sentence is horrifying on so many levels...that someone wrote a script specifically for Stamos...that Stamos had a band...that said band was based on his fictional band from "Full House"...that the band was deemed sufficiently popular enough to tour the country...quick, someone give me a bottle of bleach to guzzle. I can't stands it no more.


Zander Cannon said...

You might want to take a look at #11 on this list:

BlogFoot said...

Hmmm. That certainly seems like a logical progression. But I have to wonder if such an individual would be mentally adept enough to plot out career moves. I suspect, aside from the discipline required to master some form of martial arts, this individual would simply react to things in a knee-jerk fashion and let the chips fall where they may.
No planning, no foresight - just raw, unchecked instinct.

And I hate to point this out to the creator of that chart (not to mention that it sickens me that I know this), but the guy with the spike-toed boot was a different guy than the "I used to f@*k guys like you in prison" fellow.